Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel underneath the rubble of a massive cave-in

Hmm... It's New Years, looking up at the clock an hour and a half after the New Year had already started. Second day of the New Year brought no relief. Misery loves company but I would rather just curl up in fetal position alone in a corner somewhere perhaps monotonically repeating 'I hate you, I hate the bands you like,' but let me finish my rant and get back to work... only to get chastised for it tomorrow. I feel no pain. Anyways, my misery is superficial if you discount my mental health... and physical health...hmmm.

In truth I would gladly suffer alone and 10x more if it would lift its shroud over my family. I blame... nah, I won't say it.

Remember the Earth, Forget the Tray

Stupidest sign I've ever seen. The foodcourt at our student union has a sign that effectively states that it is more environmentally sensitive to not rewash trays but to package everything in plastic and Styrofoam.

Drink with an amethyst cup

I didn't see Judge Judy's name on the Amethyst Initiative list of signatories, but what signal is it that Beef O'Brady's is the only place to get food in the campus commons area? She was at the opening today. I am indifferent either way on the issue but probably lean more towards keeping 21 the legal drinking age in the US. Well it might help me given that I'm 27 and still get carded every single damn time. The only real incentive as far as colleges go is not having to card every coed in selling a lucrative commodity. I can imagine the undergrads crowding at the bar already.

Anyways, the restaurant at school has a long way to go to get past opening day jitters. Really, 1 hour for a burger. At least Joe comped me the bill.

Premonition of rocket robotic rabbits

So I've been having trouble sleeping recently, and I have had the strangest dreams. I don't typically remember my dreams but for some reason aspects of two of them stuck with me. As the heading suggests, the first is absolutely ridiculous and I would dare a psychoanalyst to figure it out, but in the dream I was launching robotic rocket rabbits into orbit. Particularly, white rabbits. When they launch they would scrunch into flat discs with only their two pointy ears sticking out like antennas.

The second one was much more detailed as I wrote it done when I woke up from the dream, but it involves religion. I'll have to sort this one out later but it seems close to a cheesy sci-fi time-travel story. Maybe I'll try to draft something later.

Rusty

Poor Rusty is diseased again. Weekly water changes is not enough it seems. He has white fuzzy stuff on the top of his head now. Another round of Myacin.

In a hurry to get nowhere

Metro, boulot, dodo. Mais il n'y a pas de metro ici,
Et je ne peux pas dormir.

Toujours pressé mais je n'ai rien fait.
Tout m'intéresse mais rien est bien fait.

Je déteste tout ce que c'est peu profond,
alors je me déteste aussi. Des autres du monde,
les choses riches et vivants, j'ai peur.
Et je suis fatigué de travailler, de soit seul.

Too Cowardly to be an Anarchist

So, much to my annoyance, I was pulled over by the police for a stop sign violation the other day.

I have mild resentment for the police. I guess it goes back to when I was a little kid, when the police would once in a while look for one of my cousins. I remember playing in the front yard when the squad car came up menacingly. Do you know so-and-so? I didn't know anything and still don't but it's not like I would give anything up. Mostly paranoia but I grew up in pretty much an all white community, and I swear that my dad was profiled when he would get ridiculous traffic tickets.

And to this day I am still bothered by when I got a speeding ticket on I4 for going 83 mph when the road was completely empty. People go that speed at when the road is busy. My aunt and cousins came to Florida and wanted to visit Disney and I drove us back home around 1am or so. The guy so easily could have given me a warning. I didn't have any prior citations. He knew we were coming back from Disney. What a way to ruin a family trip.

And if it is so reckless for me to go 83mph on I4, how is it possibly safe for him, from a complete stop, engine off and facing the opposite direction to catch up to me to pull me over?

Okay, done ranting. Everyone will now know about my die-hard-left-wing-communist-liberal-anarchist views now.

As the cop that pulled me over the other day chastised, "Let this be a learning lesson."

Baby Red Spot

Baby red spot gets eaten by Big red spot

Symtoms of Remorse or Apathy

I was thinking that I should rename this blog, Symtoms of a Complex to something more pertaining to the contents. How about, The pretentious self-inclusive world that is Kingsley? The former title seems to get more hits from people looking for medical advice. Symtoms of late stage ms, small pox, grief? Yeah, you're not going to find that here and I'd apologize if you had to read any of my ramblings looking for something with any real content. Eh, blame Google.

Die Hard Left Wing Communist Liberal

So my friends made a Facebook account for me, and apparently I'm a die hard left wing communist liberal... and married. Well, close enough; I'm not married. I still insist that I'm too old. There's a fine line to where it gets creepy. Anyways, I still have this blog page that no one reads so why bother with another.

DMB, Great Live Band

I saw the Dave Matthews Band play in West Palm Beach. It was my first DMB concert, but I have been a fan for a long time. LeRoi Moore was out but Tim Reynolds played electric guitar. The concert was worth just to see him play. Two other guest musicians on sax and trumpet. Took a long time for an encore. Great set overall.

Seek Up
Proudest Monkey
Satellite
Corn Bread
Sledgehammer
Stay (Wasting Time)
Out Of My Hands
You Might Die Trying
Drive In Drive Out
Sugar Will
#41
Everyday
Jimi Thing
Grey Street
Ants Marching

So Damn Lucky
Two Step

There's a special place in hell for how the porta-potties were. Some jackasses from New York sneaked into our seating area and a bunch of people in our row kept coming in and out. Sorry Ed, didn't catch your save-me signal from that lady.

Met some of my friend Ed's friends before the show, including a certain TV news personality that won't be named. It's strange how I use to view TV news anchors, especially this person because I actually watch his newscast. But I now realize that they are just as fallible as anyone else. I won't say anything else because there were some pictures taken of me. I can't even remember the other names anyways.

Hopefully I can catch them in my town for the next tour.

Sitting on the Job

All in a day's work.

Stooges and co. at Channelside

Shiny shirt, Pyrotechnic display, Ice cream, Almost getting hit by fireworks, Channelside coast guard, Taking over a quarter of Chili's.

Beer Robots in Action

Something seems disproportionate here

What she caught.



















What I caught?!

Play like a tiger

I had my violin recital on Sunday- played Fiocco's Allegro. This was my third violin recital. Per my usual style, used very little bow and played very softly- possibly the complete opposite of how the piece was intended. I've been working on that but my nerves always get the better part of me. My friend in the audience was about to throw something at me- so he says- to energize me.

I always have this problem in that when I listen to the performers before me, I get their melodies stuck in my head. And when it is my turn, I get into a panic and I can't remember how my piece goes. So for the initial few notes if not few measures I feel like I'm sight reading the piece. Added to the initial stress of playing solo violin, I feel like my heart would leap out of my chest. During the piece, I feel an out-of-body sensation. I would know that something would be off- say tempo for example- and my outer conscience would tell my inner being to correct it, but I would have no control and only muscle memory would take rein.

Disgruntled as usual about the performance but not as pissed as last season's Shostakovich piece. This was a replacement piece with not a lot of time to prepare. I was planning to play Kreisler's Leibesleid, but sucked it up on that piece. Maybe next recital.

My teacher always tells me to play like a tiger and not like a kitty, but I played like Mademoiselle and Blondie.

Kingsley and the Girls at conference... and Brandon, too

It's a long drive to New Orleans

Picked me up in the van. Still tired. Need power, hurry and finish graphs for meeting. Adrienne, need another "A", stupid game. Central time zone, Tallahassee picnic table lunch, I110, Pensacola, whadabout ice cream? DJ Adrienne reliving the 90's.

Ready- play. Sweet Home Alabama.

There's a missile here. That's a door, Kingsley. Smell the flowers.



If you go down, I won't be able to catch you. Battleship, airplanes, corrosion. Trucks. Olive Garden. Tunnel. Fire.

Chinese guy scared away white lady. Look away, look away, look away, Dixie Land.


Mississippi Free soda. Biloxi is on the way. Just one bet in Biloxi: to Boomtown, baby! Penny slots are no fun. Total amateur at roulette- Excuse me sir,can I take this chip home... (table operator rolls his eyes). Did you tip the guy? No, were we supposed to? I dunno. I was the only one that lost money, anyways.

Almost there to New Orleans!
Yeah! Bridge piles. Where are the Raymond Piles?

Exhaustion catching up on me- tired, close my eyes for a while. Oops, there goes Tallahassee lunch and Skittles. Ugh. What happened to that plastic bag anyways?

Finally in the city, Umm... better make a U-turn here. Hotel in French Quarters.

Bourbon Street and Vieux Carre

Fine dining next to gentlemen entertainment establishments. Probably not a good idea to go with the girls. Tacky gift shops galore. Walgreens rocks.

How did we end up paying $70 for gator and calamari and three beers?

In the city with corrosion buddies, et pas avec les mecs fracais qui toujours flirter avec mes copines.



Brandon's cover to Led Zeppelin?

Kansas Jayhawks? Boo!!


Great food. Crawfish eating contest. I so won that. I ate the claws! Beignets and hot chocolate at Cafe du Monde. Jambalaya, Gator. Moroccan in Mederie. Abita brews. Dixie beer. Free biscuits. They were free.

Before leaving, drove around Garden District. What are we supposed to be looking at again? Ah, right how to get on the interstate to get out of here before we get mugged. Just kidding, it was once beautiful and will be again beautiful, I'm sure. Missed the cemetery tour and jazz club.


At conference We continued our tradition of last minute poster printing. Thanks guys. The girls won prizes. The boys presented. Took care of business. Watched the prophet D.D. give a lecture. Didn't get to see the astronaut though, aw. Met old and new friends. But now for the long drive home.



I10 and I75: The longest journey Let the crew rest and drove the whole way back. Everyone was sleeping. Oh no, Beach Boys making me sleepy too. Change the music.

My buddy, My buddy.. Wherever I go, you go. Played car tag with other drivers. Stopped in Mobile for lunch, got lost trying to find onramp, but drove over new bridge. Extradosed or Cablestayed? Racing to Gainesville for Brandon's Purim party. Home late that night or early next morning?

Charlie Brown

from snoopy.com

CPE is not at the Ice Cream Shop

Enlightenment is through the knowledge of the CPE. Heed the gospel of prophet D.D. We are all suffering in search of the CPE.

Running joke at the lab. Or at least me and the post-doc. Everyone else probably think that we're total dorks.

Grumblings and motion to make deadlines, graduation, jobs. There seems to be a moment every few years where everything seems to be stirred up, typically when a senior person leaves and everyone else wonders what is in store in their future. Only thing is that the last time I felt this energy, three people quit. As Marge says in an episode of the Simpsons, don't make fun of graduate students, they are only people who made a terrible life decision.

Publish. Publish. Publish.

Spread the gospel of the CPE.

It hurts, it hurts

Just finished reading Stranger in a Strange Land. Why do people laugh? "They laugh because it hurts so much... because it's the only thing that'll make it stop hurting."

I thought this was really interesting, but are there other reasons why we find certain things funny? Is it some wrong or hurtful happening or idea that makes something funny.

One idea that I thought could be related is retribution. It's not just that something wrong happens to someone that makes us laugh. It's funny if a person is malicious and something bad happens in an ironic manner. Take for example the original Home Alone movies or Dennis the Menace movie. The crooks take a beating yet it is hilarious as hell because they 'deserved' it. If those same scenes were taken out of context, it would seem cruel. Christopher Lloyd being fed the canned beans by the fire. Classic.

We laugh when people act stupid. ie Mr. Bean. But it's not the fact that they're stupid that makes us laugh; it's when they get hurt due to their stupidity. Being stupid is another reason why one would 'deserve' getting hurt. Or greedy. My cousin during the movie Ratrace from laughing too hard- 'it hurts, it hurts'.

It's funny when kids mix up words. As my neice once told me, don't be a hip- py (while making a gesture hiccuping). The Little Rascals movie. Ugh.. seven. Because they are still learning, we laugh at them? Or laugh at how much more they still have to learn or how much we have been through since we were at that stage in growth?


A reflection of the dilemnas and tribulations in reality. A comedic karma to vices that we can relate to. It hurts.